By Your Local Allergy Survivor & Resident Nose-Blower, Kenneth A. McDade
Ah, springtime in Pelahatchie. The flowers are blooming, the birds are chirping, and half the town is sneezing so hard we’re considering installing windshield wipers on our glasses. Yes sir, it’s pollen season—and this year, it’s showing up like it owns the place.
The Yellow Dust Invasion
If your car looks like it’s been dunked in powdered cheese, you're not alone. Folks around here are saying it’s the worst pollen season in years—and judging by the sound of constant sniffling at Pelahatchie Grocery and the uptick in tissue sales at Dollar General, they just might be right.
Experts (and that one guy at the co-op who “swears he can smell pollen”) say "it’s because we had a wet winter, which gave all them trees and flowers the green light to explode like confetti cannons." The result? Eyes itchier than a poison ivy picnic and noses running like they’re training for a 5K.
Tips to Keep the Sneezes at Bay
Now, we’re no strangers to allergy season around these parts, but even seasoned sneeze veterans could use a refresher. Here’s some advice straight from locals and allergy experts alike:
- Check the pollen count before you head out. If the forecast says “high,” maybe save the gardening for another day and binge-watch reruns of Andy Griffith instead.
- Stay inside during peak pollen hours, which usually hit early morning. We know that’s when the biscuits are hot, but maybe send someone else to fetch breakfast.
- Shower after being outside. Not only does it rinse off pollen, but it also gives you a moment of peace and quiet before the kids find you again.
- Close your windows. We know spring breezes are nice, but unless you like coating your furniture in golden dust, keep those suckers shut.
- Vacuum often and maybe even invest in one of those fancy HEPA filters—because nothing says “welcome home” like breathing in less pollen and more air.
Downhome Remedies & Porch Talk
Now, if you prefer the tried-and-true methods handed down by meemaws everywhere, you’re in luck:
- A spoonful of local honey might help your body build up a tolerance to the very pollen that’s got your sinuses throwing tantrums.
- Some folks swear by peppermint tea, eucalyptus rubs, and even a shot of apple cider vinegar (though it might make you question your life choices for a second).
- And let’s not forget about the neti pot—which is basically a tiny watering can for your nose. Slightly horrifying? Maybe. Effective? Absolutely.
The Heart of It All
All jokes aside, pollen season can be a real nuisance. But as always, the people of Pelahatchie face it with a mix of humor, grit, and a well-timed antihistamine. So hang in there, friends. Drink your tea, keep your tissues close, and remember—this too shall pass. Eventually. Right around the time the mosquitoes show up.
Stay sneeze-free, y’all!
For daily pollen updates and more sneezy fun, check out weather.com or swing by the pharmacy for some good advice and a pack of extra-soft tissues
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